


Brotato Chips

by AvidVice



Series: Piss or Get Off the Pot [2]
Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-11
Updated: 2021-01-10
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:20:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 12,912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28011525
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AvidVice/pseuds/AvidVice
Summary: Aria T'Loak's stay on the Citadel becomes more intolerable as Commander Shepard continues to bother her with her emotionally charged problems as if she were her own personal therapist. Can she find a way to put some distance between them or is it just going to take murder to have SOME peace before her return to Omega ?Takes place during ME3.Part 2 of Piss or Get Off the Pot series, can be read by itself.References of post Femshep/Liara and Femshep/Samara
Relationships: Female Shepard/Liara T'Soni, Female Shepard/Samara
Series: Piss or Get Off the Pot [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2051667
Comments: 2
Kudos: 8





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Welp. I dove back in and decided to expand the universe that was ' Bottoms Up' and make it into a series. I'm not sure where it will take me. All I know is that I could use a laugh and a distraction for this dumpster fire of a year. There will be five chapters of this beauty so enjoy !

Aria T’Loak watched Commander Shepard trudge to the bar as if she were a shadow of what she once was; slithering to a corner as if she planned to fade away completely. Normally, the self proclaimed Queen of Omega would brush off the temporary distraction while she continued to suffer the Citadel’s hospitality but considering Shepard’s accomplishments, the visual demanded more of her consideration. 

The matriarch leaned further into the cushion of the sorry excuse Purgatory called a couch while keeping her eyes trained on the gloomy mass of pink flesh as it levitated past the rowdy and drunk patrons towards the lower bar counter. 

There, the messy red-headed human practically laid her upper torso on the polished wood as if to relieve the dead weight of her conscience for the annoyed bartender to acknowledge. She lazily waved her hand at him, ordering a drink in what she considered a “winning” disposition as two vaguely familiar male humans followed behind her. 

Aria finished what remained of the Vorcha-piss the bar called rum. Without even being told to, her current assistant took the inconvenient empty glass from her clutch like a proper butler. The Batarian, Jikren, proved to be very useful- loyal and a glutton for the structure of knowing his place. If he continues at this rate, she will take him back to Omega with her; don’t throw away what you can use. 

Returning to the bar, she studied Shepard’s company again and recognized them as a part of her Normandy cult, the alliance jarheads- her shuttle pilot and a heap of muscles with a neck deformity. They appeared to be disfavorably bickering at her as if they were trying to convince her to leave Purgatory. Compared to what she had dealt with in the past, the scene was too bizarre to understand. Shepard usually guided her sheep good and proper; every last one of them obeyed her instructions like trained lovesick puppies. This was different. 

Jikren silently followed her gaze, observing the spectacle with a muted interest. 

The Commander dismissed their concerns with disdain and straightened up from her hammock that was the bar counter as if there were any dignity to be had. Her charges barked back, exasperated of her refusal. A few of the patrons near them began to stare, savouring the spectacle. Muscles and his unmemorable sidekick pressed on, trying to shift their tone to convince her to leave with them once more. 

Shepard scowled at them with an inaudible purse of her chapped lips and then Muscles with the missing neck reverted back to his anger. He daringly jammed his thick finger against her shoulder with a retort and she grabbed his wrist like a nimble combative rogue and twisted it- shoving his arm behind his back as if she were grabbing him to make an arrest. The maneuver was effortless but Aria had seen the quality of what the human can do when she helped her take Omega back from Cerberus’s control. Gracefully and with predictable moral insistence. 

Muscles flinched in obvious pain as he backed away, holding his injured wrist against his chest as Sidekick encouraged him to leave Shepard alone. The dominant won her independence and said something to the ogling audience she lured; they returned to their bland lives as she, to her counter. 

The bartender knew better than to make her wait so he planted a tall glass of what looked to be a brown liquor. Too light in color to be the ONLY rum they serve in this pathetic excuse for a bar, so it had to be whiskey or cheap bourbon. 

Shepard took her means of solace and retreated to the leftmost corner of the counter where she wouldn’t be disturbed. Even from the distance, Aria could see her disgusted refrain as if the entire galaxy had wronged her. 

What made her so fantastically brutish ? The Commander recently gained the Turian and Krogan alliance by curing the Genophage, even accomplishing one of those had slim to none odds but the human had an annoying way of ignoring probability. Shortly after, she successfully prevented Cerberus from taking control of the Citadel itself.

Aria started to feel parched again, Jikren read her thirst right away and left her side to get service. That was another thing about Purgatory, it’s shitty personnel- half of them were never taught to respect their betters while the other half are plain dumb. 

She continued to watch Shepard, adopting her distraction with more deliberation.

The Spectre sipped her drink a few times and slapped the glass back on the counter, spilling some of its contents. Then she went to the nearest tall table, occupied by a pair of Krogan mercenaries, and grabbed one of the tall stools that they weren’t using. They took her wordless invasion of their space as offensive as any undisciplined Krogan would and trained their sights on her as she carried the stool to the counter and sat down.

Maybe she was too distracted when she made the error OR maybe she was as thick-skulled as her approaching challengers. 

Shepard slouched over her drink paying her offended party no mind as they cluckishly approached her from behind. She glared into the void in front of her as if it were a symbol of everything responsible for her misery. 

The Krogan mercs started their protest by one of them shoving her shoulder from behind, causing her to spill the rest of her drink across the counter. The ensemble of patrons, servers, and bartenders froze around them.

Shepard grimaced at her loss that dripped onto her lap and stood up with a cold confidence that compelled the Krogan to take a step back, expecting an immediate counter. 

The muscles around her jaw twitched, almost beckoning Aria to succumb to a twitch of a smile. As entertaining and unexpected the barbaric display was, she had to think about Shepard’s ill-prepared confrontation. She lacked a weapon and she didn’t have her N7 armor to buffer even a small percentage of a Krogan’s combative force. If she made one wrong move, cybernetics and whatever the fuck else that pieced the MESS together wouldn’t protect her from getting her skull crushed in five minutes. 

Jikren returned to her area with a full bottle of the shit-rum she had to tolerate, paired with a clean new glass. He poured her two fingers and handed her her glass, opting to simply hold the bottle for now while he analyzed the new circumstances Shepard enveloped herself in. 

  
Aria held her glass closer to her chest, facing a potential decision to take action- should Shepard proceed her recklessness. 

She waited, tempting fate. 

The Commander wasted no time showing her teeth as she snapped at the Krogan, pointed at the bar to probably demand him to replace her drink. Aria could practically hear his distant howl of a laugh; the audience around them retreated to a further distance. Tension climbed, slowly causing the entire bar to quiet while the hideous music continued. 

Before Aria could translate what would happen next, Shepard instantly threw her empty glass into the Krogan’s face; he made the mistake of standing too close in her range so he had it coming. 

The glass splintered into tiny pieces. Before every shard landed on the floor, she continued to the second opponent and kicked one of his legs to offset his balance. Krogan are notoriously heavy, using their weight against them is a standard maneuver to prevent an attack and sneak one of your own.

However, Shepard didn’t use the opening Aria expected her to take; instead, she wiggled her way between them and sprinted out of the vicinity. 

Now closer to her couch, Aria had a better view of the human as she turned back around to the Krogan obviously following her, shoving anyone out of their way with purpose. 

Whether Shepard lured herself closer in Aria’s radius on purpose or not, the matriarch had to make the call to intervene. She sat up to straighten her posture as a hint for Jikren to fetch her. The Batarian placed the bottle on the sofa, ensuring it wouldn’t knock over, and went to the fray at her request. 

The Krogan with an inferior set of red armor growled and tried to swing a punch at Shepard but she ducked and returned his “generosity” with a well placed kick between the legs, specifically on the upper side of his left thigh. The sound of the impact caused the audience to shudder from such a devious tactic. Aria, on the other hand, wondered HOW a human took the time to learn Krogan anatomy.

Likely devastated from the loss of one of his quads, the wounded Krogan slouched over with a thundering cry and then charged at her for an anticipated headbutt; another devastating blow should he succeed. Shepard saw right through it and tried to get away from his projection; the idiot forgot about the other mercenary. He quickly grabbed her as if to prevent her escape; snickering to himself in premature victory. 

Aria pressed the cold glass to her lips, sipping her next round modestly. Shepard released a mighty war cry and escaped the Krogan’s grasp by head-butting the front of his aged white chestpiece. The impact created a viable enough distraction for him to loosen his grip on her arms. 

Shepard gained the advantage again, increasing the distance between them with the expression of a feral Varren, if Aria ever did see one. 

Interesting. 

Recalling the intensity she witnessed during their siege on Omega, THIS wasn’t the same grit. THIS was something more primitive. The rum suddenly tasted acceptable.

The Commander was just about to impart another dirty kick to reduce him into another weeping embarrassment when Jikren simply came up behind her and curtly pulled her aside.

“Aria says the fun is over. Leave.” Her assistant sternly said to the recovering Krogan.

The duo were practically frothing at the mouth with a mixture of rage and disappointment. They curled their fists in bloodlust, snarling for a brief second before coming to their senses. Aria knew they gandered at her long enough to know they were standing in her turf now. 

“Shepard. Aria wants to speak with you.” Jikren said with as much emotion as an Elcor while he assertively guided her to follow him by pushing her back with one hand. 

“THIS isn’t over, human ! I’m going to make you scream !” The red-armored Krogan hollered at her. His left-most quad and his pride demanded retribution but he knew better than to go against her wishes right in front of her. 

The witnesses of Purgatory slowly returned to their discomfort, hoping that was the end of the matter.

Shepard stopped, causing Jikren to bump into her.

“Yeah ?” She said with a wolfish snort, “That’s what I told yer’ mama last night !”

He spat at her, hoping some spittle would land on her but his friend pulled him back as his nervousness took proper root. 

“C’mon, Praash, we can’t now. It’s over.” He said.

“My Broodmother’s been dead for decades, DUMBASS !” His friend continued, ignoring the sensible request- just to keep his blood boiling. 

“And I’m STILL pulling splinters off me from that bitch !” The Commander reciprocated in kind.

Aria’s interest continued as she savoured more of her rum. Jikren sighed as he grabbed the fabric of the Commander’s right sleeve and tugged her away. 

“She was a beacon of our clan !” He fired back, reaching critical mass. Pushing his friend on his ass, he charged at Shepard yet again.

Jikren expertly released the Commander, allowing her quick thinking to grab a server’s tray. She flung a few pints of what looked like beer on the floor- shattering more glass in her wake. By the time the Krogan mercenary made contact, she smacked his head as hard as she could with the tray. 

He spat a wad of mucus and blood, ceasing his projection, laughing at the poor attempt, “That’s all you g-”

She jammed the dented tray’s sharpest edge against his groin, causing his statement to end with a high-pitch shriek Aria hadn’t heard come from a Krogan in centuries. 

His friend cursed and dragged him away, “The boss won’t like this.” 

Knowing the patterns of small-time mercs, Shepard won’t see the last of them. 

Aria’s assistant convinced Shepard to be seated a distance away from her. Upon closer inspection, the human looked grimmer than a moment ago. Strong stale smells of whiskey and sweat violated Aria’s space immediately. It was clear Shepard was having a mental break. 

“You continue to surprise me, Shepard. While I’m not in the habit of babysitting my allies, consider THIS a favor.” The asari said, hoping Shepard was still capable of rational thought.

“You can’t make me sit here like one of your lap pooches, Aria.” The Commander retorted sourly with a dirty look in Jikren’s direction. Her legs constantly bobbed up and down, either from the leftover remnants of her adrenaline from her brawl or anxiety. 

“I doubt they will be the last mercs you’ll piss off but try not invoking a bureaucratic shit storm while I’m here. “

“I’m a fuckin’ Spectre, I can get away with murder if I wanted to.” Aria held in her smirk as Shepard drew a heavy sigh as if she were a Volus. She combed the back of her messy head with tobacco stained fingers and looked for a friendly server, “I need a drink.” 

“What’s the matter ? Shouldn’t you be glowing from your victories so far ? I would say not many humans successfully united the Krogan and Turian armies like you have.” She returned to her comfortable slouch on the sofa, “Curing the Genophage...stopping Cerberus’s coup attempt of the Citadel. 

With that, the Commander glared at her as if she slaughtered all of her pet fish, “ Mordin and Thane are dead.”

So her shitty mood was from mourning, Aria thought to herself. 

The silence between them metabolized; Shepard proceeded to shift her broody refrain towards the bottle of rum that sat on the other side of Aria. 

The nerve. First, the asshole interrupted what was SUPPOSE to be a peaceful evening- forcing her to do something charitable while satisfying her curiosity. NOW she’s testing her generosity, silently communicating through her hoarse breathing and twitching that she desired to SHARE her rum. 

Aria tightened the grip on her glass, regretting getting involved at all but then she reminded herself that Shepard proved to be a useful ally; despite their differences- she couldn’t argue there was SOME effectiveness to her shooting everything with an occasional existential episode. She was only human and a very young one considering most of the species barely touch a century. Everyone had their off-days, even the ‘great’ Commander Shepard.

She nodded at Jikren to fetch another glass. He held back a worthy sigh and returned to the lower bar. 

“It’s more dull than I thought. This is war, Shepard. People die.” The matriarch stated, hardly putting effort in a “gentler” approach. 

“They were my friends. A part of my fuckin’ team.” Judging by her elongated vowels, she had to be drunker than anticipated. “ I think I can spare the time to grieve. They each died doing what was right.”

Aria fought her need to roll her eyes for the umpteeth time as Jikren returned with a glass and poured a meager sum for their unwanted guest. 

With her new ‘purpose’ on hand, Shepard inspected it’s contents with gratitude and newfound energy. She folded her legs and held up her glass for a toast, “THEY were the good ones. May they find peace in their afterlife, whatever the hell it is.”

She lowered her drink, spilling some of it onto her damp and wrinkled Alliance trousers. At this rate she’s a walking fire hazard. “At least Kaidan isn’t alone anymore. Brave bastard.” 

With gusto, she gulped down a sizable portion and then leaned forward, “Do you have any regrets, Aria ?”

“I’m not at liberty to share anything with you, Shepard.” Such an asshole.

“I can’t ask you questions ? I thought we came a long way since taking back Omega.”

“I didn’t get to where I am by forging friendships and trusting every jackass that I work with. I suggest you follow my example since you have the capacity to be emotionally impulsive.” Now that she thought about it, it may not be a good idea to mix whiskey with rum. 

“So if we’re NOT ‘homies’ then what the hell are we doing here ? Shouldn’t you be repainting the walls of your palace ?” She consumed another clumsy sip of her drink, Aria could see stains dripping down the corners of her mouth. 

The human was an offense to all five senses but she was seeking acknowledgement- any sort of connection to keep her grounded and that included needless chatter. Aria scanned the bar again, wondering if Shepard’s disfigured duo that were with her before would return. Judging by her instability, they must have been keeping an eye on her in the first place. Would they give up so easily or return with more reinforcements to rope their Commander back on the ship for containment ? Then again she DID snap Muscles’s wrist..

“Managing my business here is more convenient for the time being.” Aria said, deciding to cooperate. Maybe distracting her from her grief will satisfy her enough to go to someone else to mop up the tears that she appears to be holding in with fierce condemnation. Good. If she starts crying, she will have to have Jikren drag her sorry ass out of Purgatory and into the nearest transit shuttle. She has a strict policy with tears. “If you would like, we can discuss- in detail- the Blood Pack, Blue Suns, and-”

“-I have been thinking about Nyleen too ! She died doing what was right, I mean SHIT.. to jump into the abyss like that..completely untethered.” Shepard blurted in a fiery and thunderous commanding tone for attention. “I mean, the willingness to end it all, with or without regrets. That is some SHIT. Did her death affect you yet or are you THAT desensitized, from the centuries of living up there on Mount Olympus ?” 

The obvious human reference was lost on her but she reached her breaking point with her smart-ass remarks. Jikren read the grip on her glass and withdrew his concealed pistol. He aimed it at the Commander as a courteous warning. 

“Watch yourself, human.” Jikren said with a stony authority that COULD be useful for field work, should he continue to be ambitious. 

“The fuck are you going to do, Junior ?” The Commander shot back at him, brushing off the threat with the ignorance of the old bitches on Thessia. 

Aria gestured Jikren to withdraw; this was going nowhere, “My feelings are none of your business. Don’t mistake our alliance for friendship, I have no use for it.” It’s best to nip that in the bud as often and as loud and clear as she could- at least until she returns to Omega. 

Shepard snorted, throwing one arm on the sofa’s cushion beside her- resting her glass on her groin as she got more comfortable. 

“You, on the other hand, continue to lack control of your emotions. Whatever happened to the Alliance’s ruthless soldier, the Butcher of Torfan ?” She continued. 

Shepard scraped her thumbnail against the rim of her glass, disgusted with the reference that probably continues to haunt her, “I’m a badass, not a heartless bitch !” Good, it’s best not to let her get too comfortable. “You don’t know the first thing about me; it’s no different from what the others think of me !” 

The Commander paused as if to take a breath but no, she needed another drink. She downed what was left of her rum and held out her glass to Jikren, expecting to be serviced. The Batarian held back his grumble, pouring her another-reducing himself to a waiter for the evening due to Purgatory’s lack of customer service. 

“To all of you, I’m an N7 Alliance soldier, a Spectre, a Commander, the Butcher of Torfan...whatever the fuck..:” She held her new glass steadily with a resentful glare at Aria, attempting to misdirect her rage to SOMEONE, “To ALL of you, I’m everything but a human… a woman..a child on the streets ? Hm ? Them ? Fuck ‘em ! If they’re not solving our problems then fuck ‘em !” 

She, then, leaned back, sipping her drink as if she were dwelling with pride from the unsophisticated conscious thought she expressed with her foul smelling breath. 

“Interesting.” Aria could only retort, finally understanding WHAT the human was trying to relay from the verbal vomit.

“What ?” 

“You’re more defensive when we’re talking about your ‘hero worship identity crisis’ than about the dead.” 

An intense silence flared between them as Shepard dramatically went from moving her lips to say something in protest to swallowing the revelation as if she would with a bag of marbles. Tongue tied, Aria savoured the temporary victory. She hit the right nerve. 

The Commander grunted and took the contents of her glass like a shot; she held her glass out to Jikren again, “Hit me, Junior. Mama’s had a bad day.” 

“If you secrete any fluids of ANY kind in my presence, Shepard, I’ll throw you out of the nearest air lock myself.” The matriarch warned her; how much more could she stomach before blackout ? It had to be soon. Cybernetics or no, humans are terrible drinkers. Nevertheless, Jikren poured her another serving. By now, he had to be itching to shoot her on principle. 

“I know we don’t hang out but you’re such a naggy mother hen type, Aria.” Shepard countered, completely missing her point. 

“Don’t you have your own fan club to bother with your crisis? I think we spoke enough, don’t you ?” Hell, Aria was tempted to strangle her like she would have done with Oleg. Shepard was a disagreeable drunk she wasn’t equipped to deal with.

“I don’t have a crisis !” The Commander negated TOO defensively, “It’s just..you know how it is to have people follow you. They’re my friends but sometimes I feel like-”

Aria tightened her grip on her glass again; remorse couldn’t begin to describe her discontent. She should have allowed the Krogan to beat her senseless; an opportunity horrifically missed.

“-they don’t understand me. Maybe I don’t want them to. They NEED to believe in ‘Commander Shepard.’ Even if-” The woman stopped herself as if she stumbled upon a mine of priceless eezo. Her timely realization made Aria submit and roll her eyes away from her, “Well, shit.”

She could rub it in her face, to make her tell her that she was right but the encounter is supposed to be about forgiveness. Maybe they were finally getting to the conclusion of her issues and she could still recover what’s left of her evening. 

“Damn it, that’s what it IS, isn’t it ? I’m resisting the idolism of my entire career. Ever since I enlisted and shit, everyone kept tellin’ me how much of a big deal I am and how my decisions will shape the course of the Galaxy.” Shepard said in one breath, suddenly inspired by the concept of enlightenment, “Let me tell you something..”

“You have said plenty.”

She continued anyway, swishing the rum in her glass one would with a glass of wine, “If the Reapers weren’t in the equation, I would still be another soldier in the service, planning her retirement at Azure Resorts ! I wouldn’t be put in charge of so many lives. Maybe I wouldn’t be so close to the people I have met..maybe it wouldn’t hurt so much.” She lowered her head to silently refer to her fallen companions again and then shrugged, finishing her third glass without flinching, “Well, what’s the use of being salty about it. It is what it is, right ? I can see how YOU are the way you are, Aria.”

It continued to nerve her how Shepard kept comparing herself to her, as if it were a trivial matter to decipher. “It’s back to me now, is it ?”

“You’re tough. You’re cautious and conclusive with your own hang ups because you were sculpted by circumstance. Over time, the identity everyone chooses to believe about you becomes REAL. It’s like shedding off your skin.” The Commander untied her boot laces with the coordination of a suffocating pijack. Placing them orderly side-by-side on the floor, she proceeded to nest into the couch more to her liking by folding her legs on the sofa. The thought of her dirty feet smearing across the fabric made Aria squeeze her glass tighter. “We keep peeling off layers until there’s nothing more than the generic version of ourselves. Between you and I, I don’t think I have any layers left.” 

Her eyes began to get heavy as she leaned further back, allowing the cushions to swallow her whole. When was the last time she slept ? Did her dream team forget to put her up for a nap ? 

“It doesn’t mean shit now.” Shepard continued, “There’s no way I’ll survive this one. You and I both know it. I SHOULDN’t survive.” She carefully reached around her back, crawling her dirty fingers underneath her alliance uniform to reach to what Aria suspected was, her bra. “ And I’m spending my last moments as THE Commander Shepard because everyone needs me to, no matter how I feel about it.”

The glass finally imploded under pressure, chunky sharp shards fell on the floor as Aria watched the human unlatch her bra and methodically pull it off by worming it through her right sleeve as if she were changing in the barracks. Shepard rolled the white bra into a neat parcel and planted it between the cushions. She appeared more fatigued by the second, which meant the booze was finally hitting her. Aria started to consider putting something in her next drink to quicken the process. 

“You’re allowing yourself to be resentful of it. NO ONE asked you to sacrifice your entire being. You’re just too much of a sympathetic mind to pursue your own ambitions and tell everyone to fuck right off.” Aria said; she had to get the shit-stain off of her sofa by having her carried out at this point. Jikren will be mortified if he had to suffer more of her company and he earned a small mercy. “It seems to me that you should either ACCEPT your role definitively OR do something to change it. Either way, don’t waste my time bitching about a problem only YOU can fix.” 

Commander Shepard considered her meaning with more zest than she would have liked, “You’re right. That, uh, makes smerfect smense.” It was as though she was trying to make her body stand but she sunk lower on the couch until she was on her back, “Thanks for the chat, Ernie, yous intro..intro-introspeck-trives as fuck. I should go.” 

She passed out with the grace of a Krogan, with her legs spread out for the passing patrons to gawk at. Aria drew a breath as she massaged her temples, brushing off her mounting frustrations of the exchange for what it is. Again, she reminded herself that she was allowing Shepard this one discretion. 

“Get me Liara T’Soni.” She ordered; she wasn’t about to watch the asshole sleep off what’s expected to be a legendary hangover. 

Jikren, seemingly relieved, quickly pulled up her link and initiated a hologram before her. The young maiden answered her call rather too quickly, likely suspicious why she would call her directly. Everyone knew well to not keep Aria T’Loak waiting with the exception of the most annoying human she had ever had the misfortune of working with. 

Dr. T’Soni looked positively irked to be bothered, “Aria, to WHAT do I owe this unexpected pleasure ?” Her tone was chilly and indifferent. 

Jikren moved the hologram so Liara could see the Commander’s current deposition.

“Pick THIS up.” 

  
  


Matriarch Benezia’s daughter arrived in Purgatory in record time and with added gusto that Aria never thought existed. The young Asari was PISSED off. Cute. 

Aria knew to call Liara specifically, since she had to be the biggest cheerleader of Shepard’s cult. Also, she understood the two had some kind of sexual history- as far as she cared to know from the dossiers. It was a strange match to begin with, Aria thought Shepard’s notorious appetite for Asari companionship required more ‘meat’ but Liara managed to gain her interest. No matter..

What pestered Aria the most about Liara were the rumors of her working for the Shadow Broker. It WOULD explain her successes and authority of networks in the last year. A few of her connections vocalized their concerns about her in the past, suspecting she planted spies in their ranks. Aria wasn’t sure what was true about her but it made her more dangerous. Like the Matriarchy, she had chosen to keep an eye on her for the time being.

“Shepard, for GODDESS”S sake !” Liara exclaimed angrily as she planted her hands on her hips. She inspected the sleeping pile of pathetic garbage with disappointment. 

It became clear that the calamity had happened before. Perhaps too often.

She then took it upon herself to try to shake the Commander awake with a few intermittent gentle ‘slaps’ to coax her. Shepard ignored her request, snoring soundly. Liara cursed beneath her breath as she inspected her boots on the floor and the bra parcel that began to unravel next to Shepard’s head. She then noticed the nearly empty bottle of rum that rested on the other side of Aria with more emphasis, “Y-you fed her RUM ? Goddess !” 

The Asari quickly climbed on top of Shepard and pulled her shoulders, attempting to make her sit up, “She just went whiskey tasting with Zaeed..Steve and James were supposed to be watching her ! I can’t believe they just left her here, we had an agreement !” 

She managed to move Shepard against the cushions so that she was upright; Aria continued to be entertained as she slapped her esteemed colleague several more times until the Commander began to mumble. 

“Liara, what are you doing here ?” The Commander could only ask. It was surprising she could speak at all. 

“I suppose Dr. Chakwas will have to suspend her much deserved rest to do another stomach pumping before take off.” Liara said between her teeth, stewing in her impatience as she grabbed Shepard’s boots and shoved them in her possession- to get her to put them back on, “ You NEED to stop doing this to yourself ! We’re too tired to fight Reaper and Cerberus forces AND your mental faculties !” 

Commander Shepard cackled at the complaint with annoyance, refusing to put her boots back on. Instead, she held them against her chest with one arm, “ Thane died, Liara.” 

She glared at her with vigorous animosity that Aria couldn’t help but find it illuminating. 

As if there was no one else around the pair and their strange exchange, Liara growled as she grabbed the boots from her and reduced herself to put them on her Commander’s feet with haste “ I know but that’s not an excuse, Shepard. Three days ago you drank yourself into the void after several more of your fish died !”

“It was my fault that they died. All of them. Even the fish !” 

Liara briefly tied the laces so that Shepard wouldn’t trip over them, “ We have a war to win and we can’t waste our focus cleaning up after you and making sure you’re alright.” She straightened and grabbed her hand, pulling her up on her feet to stand. They lingered for a moment to ensure Shepard could manage her own balance, “ I know a great burden is on your shoulders but we need you to stay as level-headed as possible.”

She fixed the Commander’s collar, brushing off the dirt and stray red hairs that decorated the front of her uniform as a lover would. 

Shepard shoved her hands away in refusal, “Spare me the lecture, Li. I never asked you to hold my hand all the time. Damn it, we’re not together anymore !” 

One of Aria’s tattooed brows rose from the implication while Jikren planted a new glass in her hand without her feeling it. He poured her what was left of the bottle, since Shepard drank most of it, hoping to cement what little amusement she was getting from the performance. 

“ WHAT ? Did you honestly think that our past has anything to do with it ? Not everything is about you, Jane.” Liara could only counter with a meager sum of dignity. Judging by her unimpressive response, Shepard’s claim struck a nerve.

Shepard snorted a laugh as she grabbed her bra on the couch, “That is RICH coming from you ! You have been ridin’ my ass about ‘us’ as soon as I picked you up from Mars ! I mean, where the fuck did that come from ? You never said a word to me during the six months I was under Alliance surveillance. Instead, you waited until the Reapers invaded to talk about our relationship. You came to me just like everyone else for answers !”

Liara shook her head, knowing it was fruitless to argue with the logic of a drunk, “YOU said you didn’t care !” She relented, lowering her voice as several of the patrons worriedly looked over, hoping Shepard wasn’t going to provide another intrusive performance. “ We moved on from that. I was JUST saying we would be more productive if we didn’t have to take shifts every time you get disagreeable.” 

Too drunk to process her reasonable request, the Commander groaned in defeat as she draped her bra around her neck like a scarf so she wouldn’t be inconvenienced to hold it any longer, “ Where the fuck is Kaidan ? HE would agree with me !” 

Liara allowed the pregnant silence to engulf them for a moment, surrendering any other attempt to argue with her, “ Kaidan is dead.”

With that the Commander glared at Liara as if she had killed him herself, “ W-WHAT ?! HOW ?” Her knees wobbled just in time for her loyal companion to catch her from falling. Liara sighed and wrapped one of her arms around her shoulders and helped her find her footing. 

“As educational as this is, have your lovers’ spat somewhere else before I kill you both.” Aria said as Jikren gratefully withdrew his pistol again to prove they were serious. Needless but she could appreciate the extra effort. 

Liara ignored the threat as something elementary as she helped Shepard forward who started to drunkenly grieve, “Your biological logs on the Citadel said you have only been here for forty minutes, I just don’t understand how you can drink so much in that window of time.”

Shepard wiped her tears with a part of her scarf-bra, trying to stuff back her emotional ineptitude where it belonged, “ Where is everyone going ?”

Purgatory returned to it’s mediocre state as soon as they left. A few of the staff finally got around to sweeping up the broken glass. 

She sipped her last drink for the evening as she concluded there were two things she could take away from Shepard’s encounter. One, the woman was more insecure than she gave her credit for. Two, her relationship with Dr. T’Soni had already ended some time ago. Both revelations are useful to keep in mind, should she have the misfortune of handling either one of them again. For the sake of the time she has left on the Citadel, she hoped it wouldn’t be any time soon. 


	2. Chapter 2

News of Shepard’s current situation continued to blare through every terminal, network, and noisy fuckin’ corner of the Citadel for day cycles. The situation between the Quarians and Geth reached its final form. The Quarians thought it was the perfect time to consolidate their efforts to retake their home-world and of course, Commander fuckin’ Shepard was in the middle of it. Through her networks, Aria learned the epicenter of disaster was attempting to mediate peace between creator and creation, as if there were a prayer she could rope both useful allies into her fold against the Reapers. 

It was a stupid move. It would be faster and easier to focus on the Quarians and their fleets. To try to preserve the Geth would mean to try to find a way to stop the Reapers from infecting them into pawns. It would be dangerous to take in such a vulnerable ally and it required time and focus she should use elsewhere. Like Thessia.

Privately, Aria started to worry. 

For the past two weeks, she re-read every report she could get her hands on. Asari intelligence was running thin. Communication blackouts became more rampant in most of the sectors of Asari space. The last consensus of the Asari commando count was alarming and that was a week ago. So far, nothing more was coming in. The Reapers were tearing apart her people and their leaders, aristocratic shrewd bitches, CONTINUED to find it prudent to stay out of Shepard’s alliance. The mistake started to enrage Aria as the concept of seeing the extinction of her people may be a reality. 

As much as she hated Thessia, the thought of it reduced to ash would spell doom to the Asari. Her people weren’t built for war in the front-lines, the bulk of them could have been annihilated by now and Councilor Tevos was sitting on her hands. 

Councilor fuckin’ Tevos. 

Jikren continued to stand like an immovable statue as he kept their surroundings undisturbed by shooting a death glare at anyone coming near their invisible boundary line several feet away from the couch. He understood she was in a seething mood for a single needless exchange. 

Aria placed her glass back on the new coffee table in front of her. Her assistant surprised her even further with his dedication by arranging for the convenient piece of furniture. She had everything she could need within reach such as cigarettes and the bottle of Noverian rum that she procured from a refugee; best damn Turian hoarder she had ever the pleasure of doing business with. 

Fuck it. She grabbed another cigarette from her gold trimmed case and fired it up. 

Tevos was on the top of her current shit-list. The tight-ass has been nervous during their last several “friendly” briefings. Recently, Aria made an agreement to reserve several regimes of her own collection of growing mercenaries and free-lancers for Tevos’s use as they both stomach the notion that their people could be on the verge of ruin. It wasn’t like she had a choice. Tevos continues to avoid disclosing what she was going to use her forces for but Aria could guess it would be for recovery and retreat if they get an update from Thessia. 

Yesterday, Tevos requested an updated count of her forces which could only mean that she is suspecting emergency recolonization efforts. The bitch continues to evade her demands and furious questions, she refuses to tell her anything about the Matriarchs’ plans. What the hell were they waiting for ? 

All she could do to relax was to ensure Omega was running smoothly during her absence. An influx of refugees flooded her station as the Reapers continue to infest the systems like a plague, out of the numbers she was able to add more soldiers and technicians to her arsenal at rates she had never seen before. Recently, she estimated how much room she had left on her station. She suspected by the time the war was over, many more of the homeless would look to Omega for a new start and she had to be prepared to bolster her numbers. 

Aria wasn’t a fool not to see the benefits she was gaining from the war. She had more lackys, wealth, and political standing in the galaxy than ever. Unfortunately, most of her recent successes was due to her strengthened ties with Shepard. The second asshole on her shit-list. 

Her alliance with Shepard opened channels across the spectrum, multiple intelligences of different species have been willing to conform to her networks simply because they trusted the glorified fuckin’ icon. Even the Salarian STG has been sniffing at her in curiosity. Shepard’s brand taunted her at every turn but she wasn’t able to discard what she could use. After the war, everything will be different. There will be catastrophic losses on all sides but the Asari, Salarians, and Turians could be reduced to mere millions alone. The political balance will shift dramatically. She suspected the Krogan will take the helm while her people squirm to recolonize and rebuild; since the Genophage has been cured- their numbers will soar. 

Like every other day cycle, Aria found herself thinking about the stressful scenarios. She continues to wait for the update on Thessia, longing to return to Omega soon. 

Lately, she finds herself in a strange pattern. Get up, drink. Bitch at Tevos. Drink. Check the news. Drink. Eat Spectre O’s straight out of the box at bedtime until her exhaustion permitted her a few hours of sleep. 

She started to think about turning in early when she spotted one of the biggest headaches of her life. 

“Fucker.” She cursed as she tapped the end of her cigarette against the edge of the glass ashtray.

Commander Shepard entered Purgatory with a nauseating cool confidence. Cleaner than last time, the matriarch can expect her to be better behaved. She was escorted with the second human Spectre, her former protege, Ashley Williams. The Alliance’s current golden child but Aria wasn’t impressed by her. As far as what she interpreted from her record, she was a military brat from a militant family with nationalistic ideals. She could never be Shepard’s match and the Council making her a Spectre was a joke- it shouldn’t be considered valid since it was pushed by the traitor, Uudina. 

Aria puffed a cloud of smoke in their general direction as they walked up the short set of stairs into the lower bar area. They went to the counter in high spirits, chatting away as they had their first round of drinks. The Normandy had only just arrived, maybe they were celebrating their ‘progress’ with a rest before setting back out again to play peacemaker with the Quarians and the Geth.

While Thessia was burning. 

She jammed her cigarette into the ashtray while Jikren revealed a sour sigh. He wasn’t pleased to see the asshole either. 

They watched the pair from across the room. After twenty minutes they had two rounds and seemed to be talking about something in great depth. The subject had to be controversial because the both of them were very dramatic with their hand gestures and body language whenever one said something triggering. 

It was clear the discussion was going to be heated and Aria wondered if it would turn into another confrontation for Shepard’s bar brawl fetish. Then again, her companion had to have more merit than the Krogan mercenaries she humiliated. What reason would she have to slap around one of her prized ass-kissers; the Shepard-wannabe ? She was in a love-hate relationship with her own image; she wouldn’t do shit to offend it no matter how much it made her miserable. 

Aria watched as their exchange took the predicted turn when Ashley accelerated her frustrations by stabbing Shepard’s chest with an accusing glare. Shepard slammed her drink back down on the counter, likely spilling more than half of its contents across the abused surface. 

The Commander returned the affront by saying something so profound- through her clenched teeth- that it caused their audience around them to retreat to a safe distance. 

Just when Aria thought Shepard was going to pull another attention-seeking stunt, Ashley Williams simply ended their conflict by throwing the rest of her drink at her and storming out of the Purgatory with the rage of a vigilant Krogan warlord. 

Shepard was left alone again, brushing away the droplets of liquor that lingered on the front of her Alliance uniform. 

The Queen of Omega put out her cigarette, frightened at the growing possibility that Shepard would take advantage of her hospitality again. Jikren started typing on his Omni-Tool to organize a shuttle pick-up to solve the very issue. Though his preparation continued to be aspiring, she wondered if leaving would be counted as a surrender. 

Like fuck she was going to allow Shepard have the best of her.

The Commander moved away from the lower bar and towards her territory; the seconds that followed felt like hours. It felt like she was in the middle of a fatal collision crash, unsure where it may take her fate.

To her immense relief, a human waved her over from the table by the stairs that lead to the upper bar and dance floor. In all the worry, Aria failed to notice the female from before and wondered how long she was there. Tattooed and dressed far too alternatively to be another Alliance-lacky, it took Aria a moment to recognize who it was.

Subject Zero. The tattoos should have tipped her off sooner; she remembered seeing her with Shepard on Omega- whenever she stopped by inbetween her search for more issues of Formax from the market district. 

  
  


Shepard immediately relaxed and joined her table.

Among Shepard’s collection of devotees, Jack fell into the small category of ‘avoid on all fronts.’ Based on the mildly amusing data there was about her, her unique past with Cerberus should be enough warning. Groomed to be a biotic weapon in their arsenal, she represented one of the few human biotics Aria would count as, ‘challenging’ should they cross paths. Subject Zero is a walking threshold of destructive energy that’s stuffed inside an emotionally disturbed child. 

For reasons Aria could never understand, the boney red-flag worked as a teacher at Grissom Academy before everything went to shit. Even if the Alliance thought it was best to keep her under surveillance, why would them make her an instructor ?

The attachment she has with her teen biotic force didn’t fool her. A bomb is still a bomb, no matter how it’s dressed. 

Aria rolled her eyes, shifting her attention to her datapad that rested beside her. With luck, Shepard will get her satisfaction from her playmate and leave her the hell alone.

As usual, the matriarch reviewed the number of her troops that still waited for Councilor Tevos's order for deployment. The majority of them were the Blue Suns and their expensive collection of mechs. Recruitments have doubled due to desperate refugees and it seemed the Blue Suns have lowered their standards. It’s possible their leader, Darner fuckin’ Vosque, is taking the opportunity to increase his base with as many bodies as possible. If he weren’t such an asshole that only thinks with his dick, she would be worried. For now, whatever his ambition was- it’s only increasing HER power alone for the moment.

Aria tossed the datapad aside, irritated it always boils down to her looking at numbers. She continued to her Omni-Tool to check her messages. More reports from the damn Salarians again. She couldn’t delete them fast enough. 

“I know we’re at war but DAMN !” She mumbled to herself as Jikren looked on, lost in his own brief contemplation. 

By the time she managed to delete twenty five MEANINGLESS intel reports, she found a message from Barla fuckin’ Von. That son of a bitch. As if she needed another one of his Armax Arena ‘helpful suggestions’ message-fuck. It continued to elude her how the Volus continued to beat her score by LARGE increments. So far, there hasn’t been ANY evidence of cheating. There weren’t any illegal suit enhancements or hacked weaponry with nuclear damage…she even had someone tail him for awhile but his movements showed nothing unusual. 

She will have to return to Armax to reclaim her mantle soon; what was supposed to be a stress relief- turned out to be an annoying competition that she was forced to participate in. 

Aria deleted the message without reading it. It would be easy to have him killed, Shadow Broker agent or not, but that defeats the purpose of a victory.

Even through the loud music, she heard footsteps slamming down the upper bar’s flight of stairs with thunderous banter. One of the vomit-strained voices belonged to her continued source of detestation.

“Not fuckin’ YOU, Jack !” Shepard grunted with a sense of betrayal as the skinny biotic prodigy followed after her, “I can’t believe this shit- Liara got to you too. YOU, of all people !”

As soon as they reached the bottom of the stairs, Subject Zero grabbed the disgruntled woman by the shoulder and yanked her back with strength Aria didn’t expect from a lanky human specimen.

“Don’t put this shit on me, Shep, you have been diving off the deep fuckin’ end for weeks!” Her companion barked back at her with a sense of righteous indignation. 

Once again, Shepard’s bullshit demanded her complete focus. Aria’s frown deepened as Jikren handed her another cigarette. As if she couldn’t be bothered by the strenuous task of reaching for one herself.

“It’s NOT like that ! Liara’s got you brainwashed like the rest of them ! We have been through so much together and you’re going to fuck me like that, by being another one of Li’s nannies ? Who the hell is next ? GRUNT ?” The Commander growled as she shoved her grip away with more of a grimace than was needed. 

“Holy shit, Shepard, how tanked are you ? Look, your ex kept filling up my inbox with all her warnings until I had to see it for myself. I mean..what the FUCK ? How the hell did you get that many bottles in the fish tanks like that ?” The equally drunk trespasser said as if her ‘I’m going to kill you’ tone had any sort of calming effect. 

Aria’s stomach tightened as they drew closer to her area; Jikren slowly drew his hand to the pistol strapped to his right hip on instinct. She shook her head to tell him to back off of the notion. 

“And how did you get C-Sec so fuckin’ pissed at you ? I heard Bailey is getting his ass handed to him by the politicians.”

Shepard’s distress wavered as she processed the simple inquiry with a chuckle-like grunt, “THAT wasn’t my fault. It was Kasumi. We killed the Hanar ambassador because he was indoctrinated and intended to destroy his own planet. That’s about the sum of it.”

“The jellyfish was working for the Reapers ? And how the fuck did Kasumi get involved?”

“It was intel she found in her dead boyfriend’s graybox.”

Subject Zero wiped the light perspiration that built upon her chin, “Cool. So, what the hell did the Elcor have to do with it ?”

“SHE has a name, Jack. It’s..” Shepard paused with immediate doubt, “Well, she has a name. I was helping her work things out with her employer and things got out of hand.”

“They found you practically naked, riding whatever-her-name-is, stampeding against a bunch of krogan mercenaries." Jack stated.

To think that the Normandy only docked recently. The human was a menace. 

"Oh those fucks..they keep following me because I owe them credits or something, I forgot," the Commander said as traces of spit trailed down her chin. "Whatever that Elcor's name is- helped me out that time. Good woman. She gave me her extranet address."

Her audience silently wondered if she were serious as she finally wiped the spittle from her face and smeared her dirty hand against her wrinkled uniform that had to be two sizes too small.

"Are you going to go for it ?" Jack finally asked with a stupefied expression as if the concept was plausible.

"WHAT the fuck, Jack ?! She's too young ! Besides, my romance days are long over." Shepard grunted, between being offended and bored of the subject altogether.

They were still approaching her territory, slithering to the imaginary boundary line as Aria and Jikren straightened in alarm.

“Bullshit. I heard about your run-in with the old bitch from Tali’s newsletters. She keeps sending to everybody, including ME. We’re not even salt-and-pepper like you and your new favorite.” 

“Tali is talking about me in her newsletters ? What the fuck ? Does EVERYONE know my business ?” 

Jikren quickly grabbed the bottle of Noverian rum as if to shield it from incoming fire. 

“Who doesn’t know at this point, Shep ? If you’re not talking to yourself in the mirror about your problems, it’s gonna be sure as fuck with-”

They stopped as they stared at Aria, somehow passing it off as acknowledgement of one of the fuckin’ servers. 

Jack scoffed her nose at her in a manner she didn’t expect and returned to Shepard, “Look, whatever you have or DON’T have going with that old bit-”

“-Quit calling her that ! She has a fuckin’ name, Jack. Just like...that Elcor.”

“FINE. Whatever you have going with HER is none of my fuckin’ business. I get it. I’m not going to give you shit about it like some of the others. I mean, damn, you know how to pick ‘em. Your first squeeze knows when you take a piss.”

Shepard returned to a less confident stance as she haphazardly folded her arms and used all of her strength to try to keep her balance while she stood still, wobbling like a fuckin’ Hanar. 

Jack stopped herself, “It’s none of my business. With everything going on, I just want you to know you can give me a call if you just want to..” She swallowed as if the words she ingested were jagged marbles, “..talk. You know, what normal friends do..drink beer and scratch themselves.” 

The Commander saw right through her bullshit but for the sake of continuation- tolerated her trespass, “This new ‘you’ is starting to freak me out, Jack. What’s next ? Are we going to start syncing our periods ?”

Jack shook her head and showed signs of retreat, causing Aria and Jikren to renew their concerns, “Well fuck me for trying. Don’t die out there, alright ? Try to take care of yourself.”

As if they were watching the last shuttle to survival leave them to suffer a slow and agonizing death, their only shield left the bar.

Shepard turned to Aria in an instant, appearing as though she had a mind full of crazy to purge, “Aria.”

No. Not today.

“Shepard. After last time, I would say we have seen enough of each other, don’t you?” Aria said as threateningly as she could to repel her but she knew it would be fruitless. The woman smelled like she dunked her head in a barrel of liquor. 

The Commander continued to sit on her couch, ignoring her disinvitation, “I need a friend, Aria. We’re, like, BROS at this point !”

Jikren placed the bottle back on the table and quickly pulled out his pistol. As if that would do shit. He parked himself in front of her but she ignored his presence just as she devalued hers. 

“WE are NOT friends.” Aria found herself repeating yet again, “Why don’t you feed your insanity to your Cerberus friend.”

“Jack? Eh, she has her kids to worry about. Besides, things haven’t been the same since that day with the handcuffs.” She proceeded to shudder from the strange recollection, “Damn it, I can’t even think about baby oil without having a panic attack, I-”

“-Shepard. I don’t fuckin care. Now, go, I’m in no mood for your shit today.” 

Jikren renewed his presence by aiming his pistol at Shepard’s head to summarize Aria’s tolerance for her bullshit.

The human merely grunted and dismissed his threat by pushing the pistol aside, “Junior, the last shit-stain that pointed a gun at me was an indoctrinated Geth Prime and I’m using that fucker’s head as a personal tampon dispenser.” She returned to Aria as if their short exchange meant nothing, “Man, I’m making a lot of period references today. C’mon, Aria, you look like you have been through a shit-day too. So, let’s talk about it ! I’ll buy the drinks this time !”

Aria could feel her frown enter a new phase of permanence- where she could feel the tingling sensations of an arachnid's sting on both corners of her mouth, “Do I SEEM like the sharing type to you ?” 

“Then I’ll share ! I have some information that you might-” Shepard was interrupted by an unexpected hiccup, followed by a brief feeling of nausea, “-find interesting. I got some data from a mission I did for the Asari government. It was to investigate a distress call from commandos stationed on an Ardat-Yakshi monastery.” She stopped there to determine whether or not Aria was going to take the bait. 

Under NORMAL circumstances, she would have her persistent annoyances killed at this point BUT Shepard, despite her growing list of shortcomings, is too valuable of an asset to get rid of.    
  
Still, she found the intel interesting enough to permit her to stay. Ardat-Yakshi monasteries (since there were so few) were regulated through the highest classified channels. Even SHE didn’t have the means to find one of them- if she desired to. If the old bitches tasked Shepard to clean up one of their ‘loose ends’ while Thessia burns- then she grossly underestimated them. And Tevos..

Aria tapped the tips of her fingers against her abdomen as Shepard continued to wait for her invitation. The first human Spectre lazily looked at the contents of her new table as if it were a buffet. 

Tevos has been busy. 

As if it pained her, she gestured Jikren to back off and felt his silent protests when he returned to his post. 

“If you bitch about ANYTHING off topic, I will set you on fire.” Aria stated as coherently as she could. She didn’t understand why she continued to put the extra effort in.

“You’re not the first Asari to use that threat on me.” The Commander snorted, unaffected. She leaned back into the sofa, getting TOO comfortable for her liking. 

“I will be the last if you don’t get on with it !” 

  
  


Jikren added to her point by aiming his pistol again- but squarely at the Commander’s groin. The gesture made her squirm. Aria had to give him points for applying himself, threatening genitalia is quite effective. 

“Right, the monastery.” Shepard repeated, recovering from the threat haphazardly as she nervously cleared her throat, “It was on Lessus.” 

She swallowed as her overall demeanor shifted to a disturbed nature,” As usual, I took a squad to check it out. What we found was..” Her glare finished the rest.

“The Reapers.” Aria summarized. She couldn’t say she was surprised and understood the situation perfectly. The Matriarchy couldn’t leave their dirty laundry out for the masses to see, even during mass annihilation. 

A momentary silence engulfed them both as a server tiredly approached them to take their order. The female human with brown hair and dark circles beneath her eyes took a moment to recognize Aria’s company.

“You again ? Commander, the staff is starting to worry.” The server said with disappointment.

Commander Shepard merely took her despondency as an opening to place her order, “You need to speak louder, babe. Now, I’m going to do something a little different.”

The server appeared to be aging progressively, “Please don’t.”

“I would like a Prairie Fire, puh-lease and thank you.” 

The sense of righteous indignation that she expressed through her shuffled composure was enough to make Aria make a hard eye-roll to Jikren. He was already in a splendor of several of his own.

The server gave Shepard a brief ‘up and down’ examination and shook her head, “Commander, do you KNOW what that is ? It’s not for the..slop- I mean, UNIQUE drinkers.”

Shepard to take her doubts offendedly, “Listen, sweetie, I didn’t get to where I am to be questioned about my drink choices. Especially by a-” She paused to give the server a once-over of her own, “Jesus, how old are you ? You can’t be twenty-one yet, why are you serving drinks ?”

“The legal drinking age for humans was reduced to eighteen, MA’AM.” The server countered with a sarcastic ‘fuck-you.’ 

Shepard dismissed the insult with growing impatience, “Just get me my drink and I’ll give you a big tip for your college intuition- if there will even be any colleges after this shit-show.”

The server simply swallowed her pig-headedness as she must be with the rest of drunken patrons of soldiers and mercenaries. Aria was impressed with her guard to tolerate bullshit; a skill often under-appreciated. 

“One Prairie Fire coming up, I’ll be sure to ask the bartender to put more ‘fire’ in it.” She said in a deadpan expression. She left as though she could puncture holes with her high-heels.

The Commander returned to Aria, “Nice kid, ANYWAY. Where was I ?” 

Aria said nothing as she rubbed the sides of her temples to fight back the headache that was surely coming.

“Right. We found the place swarmed with husks. The commandos were wiped out before they activated the bomb. The Ardat-Yakshi were indoctrinated and turned into husks I had never seen before.” 

NOW they were getting somewhere. Shepard quickly reflected a boding glare into the space in front of her, she wasn’t bullshitting at the slightest. 

“So the Reapers found a way to weaponize Asari. I’m not surprised.” Aria said as Jikren planted a new glass of rum in her right clutch. It was good of him to guard the bottle because Shepard was already acknowledging its existence as she spoke. 

Shepard activated her Omni-Tool and scrolled into several screens, “ It’s not polished but this is all I have on the husks. The Alliance is already nick-naming them, ‘Banshees.’” She sent copies of the data into her STILL crowded inbox. At least it was a tactical decision- to share the data of a new enemy. Aria doubted the Alliance would extend the same courtesy to her armies of mercenaries. 

  
  


“They are tough bitches to take down… and with substantial biotic capabilities UP the ass.” 

Aria disregarded her ‘poetic’ description as she quickly looked over the data. There were clips of the hideous creatures and each one gave her a sense of nausea. “Were the ones you encountered SPECIFICALLY Ardat-Yakshi ?”

Shepard wiped her palms on her thighs, “ What you’re really asking is if the Reapers can harvest and use ALL Asari for their armies. I would put credits on it. I mean, look at the shit they did to make Brutes. Garrus is STILL stomaching that one.”

Aria continued to examine the data Shepard provided for her. Aside from the vid clips and geometric readings, Shepard took the liberty of inserting several of her own personal notes about the abominations. Keeping a record of your encounters of combat is useful when it works but Shepard’s rendition of note-taking was just as asinine as her ability to speak professionally. ‘Sagging tits,’ and, ‘Toothy broads with superpowers that give you too much lip,’ hardly painted a portrait. 

Still. How did the Reapers know to target Ardat-Yakshi, specifically ? What was it about them that inspired suitable soldiers ? Was it due to their deadly potential in biotics ? 

To think, roping the ones that chose to live in isolation (under the guise of ‘peace and meditation’) turned out to be livestock, waiting to be used as tools. It wasn’t that she pitied them, it was that this all could have been prevented if it were not the hideous diplomacy traditions the Asari CONTINUE to enforce. 

Where did that fuckin’ lead them ? To Thessia’s expected destruction. 

“Fuckin’ Reapers..” Shepard grumbled as the edges of the microscopic strength of her emotional restraint waned. She darted left to right, teleporting to whatever the fuck disturbed her. Whether that had to do with her past or future was her knowledge alone. 

“Their depravity never ends, not that I expected it to,” She continued as she grabbed her own cigarette that was surprisingly tucked underneath her left bra-strap. “It was horrible. And you know what ? Councilor Tevos was tight-lipped about the entire thing afterwards- the same shit she pulls whenever I BEG her ass to reconsider the alliance.” 

Aria grunted as Shepard straightened her wrinkled cigarette, “Is there anything else ?” As much as she acknowledged the fact that even a half-wit like Shepard could see through Tevos’s bullshit, she knew better than to expand the subject. 

The Commander returned to her stocic impression, “I haven’t even told you the most important part.” 

Given her serious tone, the information must be valuable. Aria waited impatiently as the human lit her cigarette and puffed away to note how private their discussion will be. At this point, Jikren was itching to take out his pistol again and finish what he started. 

“Samara was there. A former member of my crew.” The words escaped her as if they seriously harmed her. 

The glass of rum Aria held was cracked by the time she reached for her own cigarettes. She fell right into the damn emotional trap like before. Jikren retrieved her defective glass and left her side for a new one. 

As soon as her wrath subsided enough for her to process the pivot. Justicar fuckin’ Samara. She was another fuckin’ specimen on her ‘avoid on all fronts’ list. Her name in Asari culture continues to be legendary because she’s the most rigid Justicar alive. While someone might respect that kind of dedication, Samara has an impressive record of kills that could rival a rogue Ardat-Yakshi’s. Given her accomplishments, it didn’t take long for the Asari government to be interested in her. In the past century, the league of aristocratic bitches have looked to her as the tip of their spear. Even politicians wanted to reap the growing fear and fame she harvested over time. 

Due to the devotion of her oath to ‘punish the guilty,’ Aria knew better than to trifle with the likes of her. The last thing she needed was a Justicar on her ass. Unfortunately that ended up being the case anyway- since Shepard had a terrible habit of collecting inconvenient companions. 

Aria recalled seeing her in person for the first time with her. The human royally pissed her off. Who takes a Justicar to Omega ? 

Understanding HOW Shepard recruited the most inflexible Justicar in the order painted a clearer picture. There was never a human on record to ever receive an Oath of Subsumation before; it was fortunate Aria didn’t have to deal with the likes of her for long since an rogue Ardat-Yakshi had most of her attention. 

It was a shame the clean-up team that she sent over to the apartment didn’t get to the body in time. She can’t even guess what someone would want with the corpse.

From what was pieced together from the security footage in the area, Shepard lured the pest into a trap she orchestrated with the Justicar. It was rare for the likes to work together with anyone- but then again, Samara wasn’t an ordinary zealot. She had a past as ancient as the obvious mental shell she buried herself in centuries ago. 

“What the fuck does that matter ? Justicars pass through monasteries.” Aria dismissed it.

“Well, I mean, I haven’t seen her since I turned myself into the Alliance.” The Commander sheepishly slouched and pretended to wipe off a smudge off of her uniform top. “Things between us were awkward after..” She drifted off, as if she was restrained with an imaginary lock. 

Her suggestive tone was enough to cause Aria’s tattooed brow to rise in a powerful arch.

Shepard recovered and dispensed her long overdue cigarette in HER ashtray, “Let’s just say it was good to see her again.” She smashed the end, discarding the rest. “It stirred something inside me that I didn’t think was there anymore.”

Whether it was from drinking rum all day OR the implication really was hopelessly funny, Aria started chuckling, suspending her need to puff her still lit cigarette, “YOU..and the Justicar ?” 

“It’s NOT funny !” 

She started to laugh, unexpected to have her shit-mood make a full three-sixty recovery, “It’s the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard.” She had to rest her cigarette to recline back and hold her gut as her laughing fit slowly passed. 

Shepard tightened her fists that rested on her knees, expressing the scowl of a pitiable child, “As if you didn’t know ! I know how you get your lap-bitches to scout out information on your allies’ weaknesses. It makes sense- to keep them in line- but SHIT.” Whether it was from drinking or her humiliation, her cheeks flushed red as Aria’s laughing fit simmered down. “You’re just as sneaky as Liara.” 

The Commander slammed her lips shut as if she had blasphemed something devastating. Aria glared at her with an ‘all knowing’ expression.

“Damn it.” Shepard said finally in defeat.

“I see. Your relationships with Asari are as transparent as your alcoholism, Shepard.” 

“I don’t...that’s NOT true ! Look, we’re not talking about that. Subject over.” 

The human server returned with Shepard’s order, presenting her drink on the table with an indefinable expression, “Here’s your Prairie Fire, BABE.” 

The Commander instantly perked up as she seized her solace, “Just in time !” 

The translucent pale piss liquid appeared to blend perfectly with the unmistakable red hue at the bottom of the glass. The contrast in colors stayed prevalent as her grip trembled. The server walked away, it was strange she wouldn’t want to stick around to witness her handiwork in person. Maybe she didn’t care to. She was starting to like that human. 

“Why do you think you’re a publescent MORON while we’re in the middle of this shitty war ? You’re right in the center of it and you’re concerning yourself with your feelings of inadequacy.”

Shepard straightened, clicking her raggedy boots together, “I’m not ! It’s not like I’m punishing myself or something. I was just-well, it’s a long story.” She glared at her untouched drink.

“Then stop there.”

“I’m dealing with Liara’s weird tendencies to show she’s thinking of me.” She continued, tending to her further need to be the center of attention. “You know, the stalking thing paired with long cold silences. Then there was that weird thing with the A.I. she’s planting on every planet in the galaxy with an archive to preserve its history and yadda yadda.” Her drink splashed as she stared deep into it, “It’s been difficult to deal with that and THEN Samara shows up.” 

It was like watching a cheap soap opera. 

“We worked together when we defeated the Collectors. We’re COLLEAGUES. I mean, it can’t be anything more than..you know what, it’s whatever.” Shepard stopped herself, reactivating her emotional shield of denial, “It’s fine. Everything’s fine.”

The corners of her eyes started to feel raw as Aria rolled her eyes again, “I see that.” She quickly noted the Commander kept fidgeting in her seat. She was seething with tension that was seeking relief by any means. 

Likely detecting her silent critical analysis, Shepard further retreated the topic by moving her drink to her lips as she stood up, “Well, I should go. I should get out of your hair..I mean, tentacles, whatever.” She paused and toasted the Prairie Fire in mid-air, “Back to the salt mines !” 

As if with a flourish, she wolfs it down without thinking. Aria maneuvered herself a foot to the left just when the idiot convulsed in absolute disgust. She spat out her contents directly onto Jikren. Her promising assistant howled in pain as he brushed his finger tips against his face to somehow reverse the unholy concoction that trespassed him. Unfortunate BUT he should have known better than to let his guard down.

After an exhausting few minutes of watching Shepard cough into a frenzy with eyes that almost seem to bleed, Aria was starting to lose interest in their exchange again- to the point of getting another headache. 

“What the fuck is this shit ?!” the human finally managed to string together through what sounded like a painful sore throat. 

“Tequila and tabasco sauce.” 

“Well that’s not what I ordered ! That waitress tricked me !”

“Shepard, weren’t you on your way ?” The sooner she was distracted by something or someone else, the sooner she could get to her Spectre-O’s.

“But we haven’t talked about YOU yet. It’s been awhile ! How are things with you ?” 

Aria released the longest sigh of her life as she glared daggers at her. It was as if she had completely forgotten her desperate escape back into her world of denial. If Jikren wasn’t still reeling from practically getting maced in the face, she would have him escort her out of Purgatory at crotch-point. 

While she considered the embarrassing idea of doing it herself, the ground slightly trembled from a unique pattern of foot-stomps. 

Jikren tried to present himself to the new trespasser but the Prairie Fire proved to be overpowering. 

An Elcor rushed into Aria’s territory with urgency. By shape of the creature’s frame, notably smaller- it was female. 

“Urgently. Commander, there are more transgressors than we previously thought.” She said to Commander Shepard- disregarding Aria’s presence. 

Shepard glared at her in disbelief and then she snapped her fingers in an eureka moment, “Rakia, that’s the name !” With that GEM of knowledge, she proceeded to examine her associate with concern, “Rakia, what do you mean ?”

“Impatiently. There are more mercenaries coming for you. They are already here.” 

With that, they turned to the entrance of Purgatory and spotted a few Krogan and a Vorcha in familiar armor. 

“Damn it ! How many assholes do they have ?” Shepard grunted, slouching down as she scanned her surroundings for potential exits. 

They had to be part of the mercenary gang the Commander insulted from before. If Aria cared enough, she would look into who the hell they are and put a stop to it- since Shepard is a temporary asset. But she pissed her off today. 

“Determinedly. I will help you, Commander. We should lead them to a clearing for optimal combative potential.” Rakia said as encouragingly as she was physically capable of expressing.

“I guess we have no other choice. Let’s do this.”    
  
The strange duo marched down the stairs, immediately seizing the mercenaries’ attention. Aria couldn’t hear what was being said but could guess the short exchange wasn’t a pleasant one. Whatever transpired between the Commander and a Krogan was enough to get their full attention. Rakia easily overwhelmed the Vorcha by slamming him off his feet with a backwards kick of one of her powerful hind legs. They managed to swing around and have their backs towards the exit- ready to lead their prey elsewhere. 

Meanwhile the servers and patrons all paused in horror, hoping for not another one of Shepard’s antics. Among the growing audience, a human male with old yellow and white armor briskly arrived on the scene from the lower bar- eager to assist for the sheer enjoyment of it. Aria knew the type since most plagued her forces with each passing day. 

She watched as he slapped Shepard on the back with a friendly platitude that made her suspect he was a part of her cult. 

Examining him further, she recognized him as Zaeed Massani. Former leader of the Blue Suns mercenary group, some speculate he created them decades ago but whatever the case, his reputation was impressive for a human. How did he come to align himself with Shepard ? 

The brawl escalated just as soon as Zaeed joined the fray, tackling the Vorcha with the brutality of a feral. 

Shepard seemed to enjoy the distraction, welcoming the chaos as she ONCE AGAIN- kicked another Krogan in the quads. As soon as her victim landed on his knees from the impact of her strike, she went behind him and held him in place with a minimally acceptable headlock. Zaeed finished his short exchange with the Vorcha and flung his limp body aside and went towards them to finish the job. Rakia took out the remaining Krogan by dismantling his charge with one of her own and bashing her front-right foreleg against him. He flung backwards and knocked over a few leering patrons. 

Several C-Sec officers arrived on scene just as Zaeed slammed the sole of his right boot into the remaining offender that Shepard held in place. The Krogan collapsed on the floor. 

Aria sat up, “Get me a shuttle.” It was going to be a long night of scrubbing the filth off her skin from the disappointing evening. 

Her assistant went to work, sending a message to her driver while she gave Shepard a last look. The Commander had a short exchange with C-Sec that oozed ‘This is Spectre business’ candor. The officers seemed so exasperated to have the matter settled that they tended to the defeated mercenaries. As dignified as her humility allows, Shepard and Zaeed laughed and high-fived before parting ways. One had to wonder what else the day had in store for the Commander as she left the Purgatory with Rakia following behind.

The mood shifted throughout the bar as C-Sec waited for additional backup- it was a shame she had to leave now that it was quieter. 


End file.
